Doughboy Died

It is with saddest heart that I pass on the following news.

Please join me
in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury
Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection, and complications from
repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy is survived by his wife
Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, who has a bun in the
oven. He is also survived by his elderly father Pop Tart. Doughboy was
buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay
their respects, including Mrs. Buttersworth, Hungry Jack, The
Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and Captain Crunch. The grave
site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, and
lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with
turnovers. He was not considered a very smart "cookie", wasting much of his
dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he
still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions. The
funeral was held at
3:30 for about 20 minutes.